Have you ever made spaghetti sauce and burned it? I sure have. If I stir it too vigorously, it loosens the burned parts from the bottom and that makes it even worse!

Proverbs 15:1 reminds us: “ A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

When we moved to Toronto many years ago, I lost my voice. We had 4 young children, the youngest was 2 and the oldest was 8. I was not a screaming kind of mom, but I had my moments. That summer, maybe it was stress, or maybe God was trying to point out to me that a gentle answer is better than screaming. I had to whisper for about 2 months. The kids all whispered back. It was one of my best parenting summers!

I also remember one Saturday night when I was helping to serve the homeless and street involved through our Community Night ministry. I was sitting at one of the tables talking with some of our folks who had come up and were waiting for the meal. There was one fellow I will never forget. He was angry. If you talked to him, he screamed at you. I just visited with the other people. My husband Bill sat down and started to visit, he asked the “yeller” his name (I was giving Bill quiet signals to NOT engage with the fellow, but he failed to notice). The fellow screamed at Bill. If I have ever seen this bible verse in action, it was here. Bill waited a minute and told the fellow; he was glad he was with us for the meal and then got up to say Grace and the meal began. The fellow was not expecting that reply. He ate his meal and then helped me clear the plates. He returned the next many Saturday nights and never screamed again. He ate his meal and was helpful.

When I have been angry or upset and choose to reply gently, I have been amazed at the difference not only in how others respond, but how I feel. You would think that yelling back would make you feel so much better, when in fact a gentle answer truly does turn the anger button down.

I have also learned that sometimes it is simply better not to reply in that moment. Sometimes wisdom applied says wait. Let things cool down.

May God give us wisdom and peace in the moments we face in our everyday lives.

Dear Father,

Thank You for Your word that instructs me and gives wisdom for every day. I ask that You help me give gentle answers instead of the angry loud ones. Thank You that when I blow it, You forgive me when I come to You to confess. Thank You for Your patience with me. I ask that You give me the needed patience in my own life.

In Jesus Name,

Amen